The Power of Fasting

Ok, I am going to get spiritual now, So deal with it. I know, total whip lash from my last very carnal entry. Same day no less.
I have had two incredible experiences that have stregthened my testimony of fasting in the last few months. I am going to share the one that effected me and my family the most.

Last fallI was feeling like a really lousy mom. I had been feeling like that for a while...I am not sure I ever recovered from the stress of 4 kids. Mostly because I was totally impatient with them Every little thing would set me off. I realized I needed to change. I was more on the side of justice than mercy. It drove me nuts that one of my children had a tendency for hitting that none of my other kids did. It also bothered me that I couldn't tell him we don't hit people in our family because I swatted him on the bum far more times than I am proud to say. Never hard or to hurt..but to get his attention.This doesn't make it ok in my mind however. It wasn't working anyway. It broke my heart that every night I would realize I acted inapropriately and that I had let my emotions get the best of me. I knew my children deserved much better.

I knew I had been a much better parent in the past and I needed to get back to that. I knew I could do better. I fasted about it on Fast Sunday in November. When I went to church I received a lot of inspiration about parenting. The thing that stood out the most was that I needed to read my scriptures more and pray more. I could not make this change alone. Parenting is far too hard and important a job to not need help from Heavenly Father.

I have made a point of reading scriptures and/or a Conference talk every day since then and I am happy to report that I have witnessed a change in myself. I don't yell at my kids any where near as much as I used to. Not because of a great ability to withstand the temptation. The temptation is gone. I feel the spirit is there and it keeps me calm. I feel I have a greater amount of charity towards my kids. It gives me great joy to surprise my children with a hug when I know they think I will be mad. I correct them but quietly and lovingly instead of with anger.

The child who hit then has not hit since, and neither have I. I am very grateful for the spirit that is in our home because of this change. I can feel the differnce in my attitude towards my children in every way. I know I could not have made this black and white change so quickly. I keep asking myself..how come I am not more mad?

I testify that if you want help with changing yourself, Heavenly Father is there and anxious to help. I believe there is nothing he is more excited to help us with.