Tuesday, April 29, 2008

Sam's many faces

Since people are saying who they think Sam looks like, I would like to say I agree with both Robin and Sarah. Sam looks so different in different pictures too. I discovered this yesterday picking out pictures for the blog. Here are two pictures. One I think looks just like Tim, one looks just like David. You tell me if you agree. This first one looks like Tim to me. The expression and shape of his face really make me think of him.

And this one looks like David. The smile is identical...especially if you see any pictures of him as a kid.

Monday, April 28, 2008

My Baby turns 3

Today is Sam's 3rd birthday. I am so thrilled to have my little baby growing up. I really don't mind my kids growing up at all. My opinion is that kids just get more and more fun the older they get. That may change when my kids turn 12 but I hear it doesn't have to. I hope I am so lucky. So far I have felt very lucky with all my kids in all their "difficult" stages.

This is a first. I have never had a child turn 3 and they not have a younger sibling. I don't mind that change either. I can give my baby the attention he wants. I just may potty train this one earlier than the others too but I am not holding my breath. Actually. . . until he is potty trained. . . maybe I should. Sammy is our little sunshine right down to his blond hair. Lincoln and Sam seem to be as good as buddies and Joe and Elisabeth. That is so fun to see. He is such a gift to our family. Thanks for being part of our family Sammy!

Sunday, April 27, 2008

The Sabbath is not a day of rest

Today was one of those Primary substituting nightmares. Oh my gosh. First of all I volunteered Friday to substitute for a primary class that none of my kids are in. I thought I had no good reason to say no so I said yes. Yesterday I remembered that today I was hoping to get a bunch of recipe cards from people in Relief Society so I DID have a good excuse. It would only make my life more convenient so it wasn't an absolutely perfect excuse and the people I was subbing for left town Friday. Too late to back out, darn it!

They split the CTR 8 into 2 classes. We have subbed for the one with Elisabeth in it and that is pretty low key, one or two hyper boys but this class has like 4 CRAZY kids! Boy did they play off of eachother too. You know those days when you want to come home and cry? This was one of them.

I learned a little something today, next time, when someone asks if you will substitute their primary class and you don't have to cause your kid isn't in it? SAY NO! Especially when you have subbed for other classes and observed that class from a distance and thought, I am glad my kid isn't in that class so I don't have to sub for that one.

I also have 13 ladies who I need to get recipes from by the end of tomorrow. Since tomorrow is Sam's birthday I would like to get it done by tonight. So far that doesn't look likely. So after I leave here in a few minutes I am going to pick up 3 ladies cards and call it good for today. I called all of them and that is the best I can do. Substituting for primary is about all I can handle of "sabbath day rest" for one day.

Saturday, April 26, 2008

The Good, the Bad and the Ugly

There are good and bad things about what was accomplished today in our back yard. First of all we are going to get a new shed. This of course is a good thing. The one that was there had a rotting floor, and no door to keep kids out of the dangerous stuff inside. We have someone coming out Wednesday to build a new one for us. YAY! So that is another good thing. Not only are we getting a new shed but we aren't going to build it ourselves. This is a picture from the company we are using. Our's isn't going to be exactly like this but this will give you an idea. It will be white with dark green trim to match our house.
The bad is that I got some nasty splinters moving the rotted wood. Ouch. They have been bugging me like crazy. Really deep and difficult.

The ugly is now we have a HUGE pile of rotted wood with nails in it at the back of our house. So much for keeping kids out of dangerous stuff huh? Who knows how we are going to get rid of that dangerous eye sore in our back yard? Anyone have any brilliant ideas? I want to cry!

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Here I Go Again!

When Tim and I lived in our old house we had lots of excuses for not working out more. One of them was that we didn't live closer to the rec center because if we did? We would be working out EVERY DAY!

Well. Now we live in another house and as it is we can see the rec center from our bedroom window, and our house from the Rec Center entrance. We also have a cheap years membership because of Tim's working at UVSC and we get a large group discount. The only thing between us and the rec center is the track that belongs to the rec center which means a 7 minute stroll. How rediculous is that? We have been living here since September and guess what. We have NOT been working out every day. Except for a date or two we havn't worked out at all...not at the rec center anyway.

I think spring helps wake you up or something because every spring I start thinking...ummm why AREN'T we getting up early and working out? I think the answer would always be...because in the winter it is too dang cold and dark to be parting from one's bed a single milisecond earlier than you absolutely have to to survive in this world. The rest of the day is just too crazy really.
Anyway last Friday Tim and I had one of those moments of rediscovery. Now we have been working out . . two days. It is just a start but at least it is a start.

The best part I find is that there isn't that constant nagging reminder in my head ...."I need to find sometime to exercise today." Exercising makes me be a little more picky about what I eat too. I am not going to get up early, sweat on a treadmill or eliptical for 1/2 an hour to lose 110 calories, just to replace them with a Twinkie. I am not saying I resist all sweets but the cheapo not so satisfying ones are easier to resist. You have put some investment in your health so you are going to work a little harder to protect the investment.

This happens every spring. I get excited about getting into shape again. I love it. I just wish I knew how to keep up the good habbits in the winter. They got to pot EVERY winter. No fail.

If you want to see what one of my treadmill workouts look like, here is a little peak. :^) The people at the rec center get kind of miffed that Tim and I take up all the treadmills.

Saturday, April 19, 2008

Something to Always Remember

I read this quote on another blog I share with some friends. I loved it. We all need friends like Christopher Robin to remind us of important truths like these.
"Promise me you will always remember:
You're braver than you believe,
and stronger than you seem,
and smarter than you think."
(Christopher Robin to Pooh)

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

How Stupid do you think I am?

First of all, please don't answer that question, I am NOT asking YOU! I am asking Joe's friends. Last Friday he was playing outside in front of our house with some kids from the culdesac on the other end of our dead end road. They asked if they could come in and I said yeah. Then it occured to me their parents may never think to look for them here since they never played at our house before. I asked them if they had a time they needed to be back and if their Mom's knew where they were. One kids said yes he needed to call his Mom. The other kid said
"My mom doesn't care where I am." I asked,
"Well, when do you need to be home?"
"Actually my Mom doesn't care when I get home. I don't have to be home until 10 O'clock PM"

This boy is an 8 year old. I know of his family from church. I don't think his mom doesn't care. I looked up his mom's number on the ward list and had him call her. When he did, guess what! He had to go home because it was dinner time. SURPRISE!

That would have been a great way to make friends in our culdesac. Keep him at our house 'til 10:00pm and not notify his mom where he was.
"But he said he didn't have to be home until 10:00pm and that you didn't care. It isn't my fault your son is a liar!"

Monday, April 14, 2008

Busy Week Ahead, and Guilt to Boot.

These are my favorite stress foods
This week I am feeling a little bit stressed. I have to
1. Write a 3-5 page paper
2. Record an interview showing all the interviewing skills I learned this semester
3. Pass out recipe cards to 15 sisters in the ward so they can fill them out and get them to me to make a ward cook book. Doesn't sound so hard does it? But I have to make sure I give it to them in person. That means I need to either go out 15 seperate times (these people are not my next door neighbors, I have to drive or walk a little while for all of them) when it is good for them, or find a time that is good for all of them to be at home at the same time. HA! I am not looking forward to it.
4. Get food to refill our 72 hour kit meals.
5. Kids are home from school all week so I have to keep them happy I guess.

Today I went to the library with the kids. Then they asked. . . "Mom, can we go to the park today?" I tried to think how I could possibly want to do that. Today was a beautiful day and the next two days at least, maybe more, are not supposed to be as nice so it seemed a shame not to go and enjoy the weather. Maybe we could have a picnic lunch too, maybe we could go to a different park then our standard one. These all turned out not to be. I just got more and more stressed trying to make it happen and thinking of not getting to work on my dreaded tasks.

I took the kids to the store and looked for picnic food on the way home from the library. I bought my ultimate temptation food that I usually don't allow myself to buy, Cheetos. You can tell I am stressed when I buy one of my 3 temptaion foods. Cheetos, Cheese Its or Oreos. Watch out, Mom is stressed !!! At least the kids get a bunch of it too, so they don't generally complain. Usually it is "Hooray!"s all around. I also did research on possible ideas I had for 72 hour kit menus. All of them expire in the next few months so I can't buy them darn it. Back to the drawing board I guess.

I spent the rest of the afternoon making progress on the other three items on my to do list. I worked on my paper (now I just have to reread it one more time Friday night), made an appointment to have the interview take place tomorrow night and put together packets for the recipe cards to be handed out. Now I will be more at ease about everything and more fun for the kids to hang around. Maybe I might even clean the cyclone that is my house right now. Tim is being awesome and making dinner.

I had a productive day right? I have felt less guilt on far less productive days. I did something to accomplish every thing on my to do list today. Took the kids to the library, checked on 72 hour kit stuff, bought the kids one of our favorite snacks, and worked on the other 3 projects. Why do I feel guilty? Because I didn't take the kids to the park! It was a beautiful day but I put my own comfort of mind over their entertainment and health. No wonder so many Moms are on Prozac. . or Cheetos. Enough is never enough. You could have always eaten. . I mean done more.

Spring Break! (not what it is for some but nice none the less)

I had a great weekend! Beautiful weather first and most of all. My family and I could not get enough of the sunshine. We finished the square foot garden preperations on Thursday night. Tim made a box that gives us 4 x 10 square feet. Filled it with fertilizer and top soil and marked each square foot off with string. We bought and planted our first crop of strawberries and rhubarb friday night. This year for the first time I am very interested in being involved in the garden project. In the past I just let Tim do it. I don't know if it is just that our youngest is now almost preschool age so I feel more free to persue hobbies like gardening or if it is I am SO SICK of being inside and am looking for excuses to be outside these days. I might also be tired of having to answer the question of "What are you planting this year?" with "You will have to ask Tim."

Saturday we went to Lowes and Walmart and bought some more vegetables and herbs for our garden. I surprised myself with how excited I was to see all the different choices and how excited I was to make them. Even better than that, the kids are excited too. We are involving them in the garden as well. They were almost as excited as me. We bought grape tomatos (my favorite), roma tomatos, basil, green bell peppers, carrot seeds, corn seeds, lemon balm, peppermint, rosemary, acorn squash seeds, and maybe an herb or more I can't remember at the moment. (You will have to ask Tim :) )

After gorging ourselves on Red Robin burgers and bottomless fries we came home and planted our new harvest. We also enjoyed our new sunburns. I do this every year. I embrace the first signs of sun and then I remember, oops...the sun is not as friendly as I remembered it andI need to protect myself and my family.

Sunday we had Family Home Evening in the back yard. We made 72 hourkits last year and so we went thorugh our inventory and got rid of the old food and made sure we had all the non food stuff in our bags.. We plan on repacking everyones bags with new food and inventoried supplies next Sunday. I really hope we don't have need for our 72 hour kits between now and then or are we going to be an unhappy family. The one week we decide we can risk being without. My kids are gorging themselves on granola bars, fruit snacks and trail mix. If anyone has a good menu for a 72 hour kit please let me know. Fruit snacks get really gross after a year just as a warning. I am looking for ideas. So far we have not been pleased by the ones we have seen. After FHE the kids played for hours on the hammock and the new tree swing that Tim made at Joes insistance.

I love Spring. Too bad we wont be able to enjoy it all week. It is supposed to be 40 degrees the next two days and rainy. YUCK! It is spring break for the kids this week too so if it is icky I can't send kids out to play. My older kids are home to help entertain and watch my younger kids. What a nice break for me that is. I slept in until 10 a. m. today! I love spring break!

Thursday, April 10, 2008

IKEA beds do it better than Dad...or Mom

I am so tired. Last night, well actually this morning at 4am Sam woke up crying. I went to him and comforted and went back to sleep. He appeared to have had a bad dream. 20 minutes later, he cried again, this time he wanted his light on, and then again. This time I woke up Tim and asked him to check on him. He wanted Mommy appearently because Daddy would not do. I heard from my bed "NO, MOMMY!" (Sam said that, not Tim.) Great!

I went and talked to him again, he wanted his light off this time. A little disgusted by now, I told him he needed to stop this because I needed my sleep and so did he. He tried to be a trooper but he kept waking up crying and then falling asleep again. Tim said he probably was having nightmares about disaperaing Mom's because he seemed shocked when they got home and I wasn't in the car anymore. He was asleep when I got out of the car to join my friends for a girls night. What is this, punishment for ditching my family for my friends?

I finally went and slept in his bed with him. That was fun! He tried to turn on his light while I was there and I had to give him the ultimatum, me or the light. "but I like light." He finally caved. After some wacky dreams, strange sounds and smells coming from my 3 sons, Lincoln's light being on, and tossing and turning I decided to go back to my bed. I also decided after sleeping in Sam's bed that maybe it was time to change his quilt cover. It's in the washing machine right now.

Not much later Sam awoke and came to our bed. After about 1/2 an hour I asked him if I could take a shower as it was time to get up. I was sure he wouldn't give me up. . .but he said quite happily "OK". I don't know how to feel about that. Appearently Mom and Dad's bed with or without Mom will do just fine. This would be a good plug for IKEA beds I guess. When you have an IKEA bed who needs Mom? He is still sleeping in my bed and it is 10:30 a.m. He never sleeps in this late. The poor little guy. Wait. . . he is the one still asleep, in my bed no less. Poor me! ----- Original Message -----

Wednesday, April 09, 2008

Brown Sugar

I just realized that every recipe I have posted on my blog shares one ingredient. Brown sugar. None of these recipes are for dessert either. Appearently any excuse to add sugar to my dinner makes it a GREAT RECIPE worth posting.

I actually have been wanting to share yet another recipe for dinner. I just tried it last week and everyone loved it . Guess what! It has brown sugar in it too. It is a meatloaf recipe that has brown sugar in the sauce. It wasn't the one on " The Hip Homemaker" because I didn't have all the ingredients. It looks to me that with all my picking on Sam, I am the one who can't get enough of the good stuff.

Tuesday, April 08, 2008

Can't Get Enough of the "Good Stuff" Part 2

4:53 a.m. this morning I awoke to a sound, much like the sound of wood screeching against wood. I had to think about it for a while in my half asleep daze. Is that Sam? At this hour? No way. . .he is peacefully asleep in his bed. Maybe I imagined it. Maybe it was something else entirely. I then heard the sound of cupboard doors being opened and closed. I decided either it is Sam or we have a very short home invader in our kitchen rummaging for food.

I went to Sam's room and sure enough his bed was empty. I went downstairs, in the pitch dark mind you. Turned on the light and there stood Sam holding a bag of chopped walnuts. He had a big smile on his face and held up his bag "Food Mom!!" He was so pleased with himself.

As a mother, my job is to teach him the skills of independence and innovation. I should have been proud of him taking care of himself and not waking me up to get him a snack at this hour. Unfortunatly at 4:53 a.m. kids in general don't get a lot of positivie reinforcement for showing these skills. Darn good thing he is such a cutie pie or he would have gotten a lot more than a small swat on the bum and put back in his bed. God knew what he was doing when he made our 2 year olds so cute. Maybe the teenage years would be easier if our kids weren't losing their cuteness by that time.

Monday, April 07, 2008

Two Step Chicken Recipe. YUMMY!

Last night we tried this recipe for the first time and it was very good. I found it on the back of a Pace Pincante sauce jar. It was as easy to throw together as a crockpot dinner but took only 20 minutes to cook. My family and I really liked it. The chicken was tasty and tender, and there was yummy sauce to pour over the rice. We put it in our family cookbook already because we don't want to forget it.

1 1/2 cups Pace® Picante Sauce (Medium)
3 Tablespoons packed light brown sugar
1 Tablespoon dijon-style mustard
4 boneless, skinless chicken breasts
3 cups hot cooked rice

Mix picante sauce, sugar, and mustard. Place chicken in a 2-quart shallow baking dish. Pour picante sauce mixture over chicken.
Bake at 400°F. for 20 minutes or until chicken is done. Serve with rice. Serves 4.

Sunday, April 06, 2008

Wedding and Wiesbaden Reunion

Yesterday we went to the wedding of two of my highschool classmates and fellow ward members. You know, the ones I mentioned in an earlier Blog entry (Blast from the Past)? They were highschool sweethearts but then they went their seperate ways. Years later they are finally getting married. It was so fun to see them together after all these years remembering them when they were just teenagers. It was also fun to see their families and other friends we went to school and church with. Both of my brothers were able to be there too so if felt like the old days. Now, instead of tallking about our parents and homework, we talked about our kids and their adventures.

Considering we all lived together in Wiesbaden Germany , it seems especially unique to be all together again in one place. Even better a place that I could easily get to in an hour. What a blessing it was to be able to go and see all these great people again. I included fuzzy pictures we took with my phone's camera but I hope to get a better copy soon from my brother and replace them.

Saturday, April 05, 2008

Lessons from my Mom

Today is the anniversary of my mothers passing. She died a year ago today from cancer. Interesting that she died so close to the same day as my father. My mom taught me a lot of important things, and blessed my life in so many ways.

1. Service- My mom magnified her callings. She made lots of meals for a lot of people (much to my chagrin as a kid). She was a great seminary teacher, Relief Socieity and Primary president. She served as nursery leader, Temple worker and Geneology librarian as well as other things before I was born. Whatever she did she put her all into it.

She was also just a great support to those around her. I will never forget the time she took me along with her to the children's hospital when a couple in our ward was dealing with their daughter's cancer. I thought we might just be in the way and she taught me that people need support in times like these. I don't even think she was their visiting teacher and wasn't a close friend. I believe she was the Primary President at the time. The father attended her funeral last year and he reminded me of my mom's service to them. He was still noticably touched by her thoughtfulness.

2. Love of Nature- As a family we did a lot of camping, hiking and just going on walks out in nature. My mom and I did a lot of this together when I was older too. Rose gardens are a special memory I share with her. When I was going to BYU she would often come all that way from Califonria to Utah just to go on weekend trips with me to Zions and Arches National Parks. She taught me to appreciate the therapeutic qualities of nature.

3. Passion for scriptures and gospel knowledge-I saw my Mom studying the scriptures A LOT my whole life. She learned a lot from them and seemed to know so much about the gospel. She taught us the gospel in a way we learned to love it ourselves.

4. The Joys of Motherhood-My Mom was a great mother, despite all the hard times I gave her. She taught us with love and patience. She wasn't one of those mom's who yelled at her kids all the time and I strive to be the same way as a mother. She used reasoning and love and was always there to listen and give good advice. She was also a lot of fun. She was often doing fun activities with us. She taught me what a good mother is. She was a great grandmother too.

5. How to be tough-My mom was no wimp. She always stuck up for herself. This bugged me a lot as a kid but now I appreciate it deeply. She was a mentally, phycially and emotionally strong person. She suffered through a lot in her life but kept on pushing until she was done, right up until the day she died. She makes me proud to be a woman and be her daughter.

One of my favorite stories my mom told was about a hike she went on as a scout leader. She was the only woman with a bunch of male scout leaders on some kind of training outing. They kept mockingly asking her if she was doing ok and encouraging her. By the time they reached their destination the guys were all worn out but she was fine. She was also the only one who thought to bring along food and drink, and enough to share with all the guys. Right on Mom!

6. A house of order and a life of simplicity- I would be lying to say if I said our house was always clean growing up. She did however believe in getting everything spruced up whenever we had company. The order she taught me was how to organize my life. She taught me also to chose my priorities and cut myself some slack in areas that aren't all that important. Cleanliness and order were important but not as important as other things, like having fun with your family. When she organized she did it with great skill. One of her last visits with me in my home was spent teaching me how to do some serious deep cleaning. You know, the kind young mothers have no time to do much less learn. These things were very handy to know when we sold our house last year.

7. Music- Any musical talent I have I inherited from my mom. She could play the piano and clarinet and taught us to enjoy good music. We loved appreciating nature while listening to beautiful music, whether driving through mountains or lying on the beach.

8. Passion for life and learning- My mom seemed to go through phases of diferent things she liked to do. I think one of my favorites was her baking phase. She also loved to ski, travel, bicycle, hike, camp, and do jigsaw puzzles. There were many other activities she enjoyed and she loved to laugh and have fun. Like her callings, when she had things she enjoyed, she put her all into them. She was always learning new things and went to college while we were going to junior college. It was fun taking classes with her. I was too shy at the time and that drove her nuts. I think I would make her proud today now that I speak out more in my classes.

I miss my mom most when I have a fun experience I know she would love to hear about or when I want advice on how to raise my kids. I often get ideas in my head that I don't think I could have come up with on my own. My Mom's visiting teacher shared with me something interesting. My mom had told her one of her favorite talks at a conference was about how a parent has as much if not even more influence on their loved ones after they pass on. My Mom was always involved in our lives when she was alive and I believe she still exerts her influence in our lives today from the other side. Her example alone still influences me on a daily basis.

Thursday, April 03, 2008

Lessons from my Dad

This is kind of a sad week for me. In the last 7 years both of my parents have passed away and it just so happned that they died within two days (and 6 years) of each other. My father passed away 7 years ago today and I celebrate his life and his contribution to mine. My Dad taught me a lot of important things. Here are some of the most important. Needless to say you will be hearing about my Mom in a few days.

1. To love books and knowledge. My dad treasured books and seemed to have loads of them. If I wanted to buy a book, I would ask my Dad because he would never say no. My dad encouraged us to learn and do well in school.

2. To laugh- My Dad had a great sense of humor. We had a lot of good times as a family and laughing was a priority. For example, it was a family tradition to copy Saturday Night Live on Saturday night and watch it after church on Sunday. This was especially true of the good seasons with Martin Short, Billy Crystal and Christopher Guest. He didn't appreciate the crass stuff. He also played great pranks. He would move the wall to his cubicle over just a little bit every day making his cubicle a litte bigger and his neighbors smaller until his coworker noticed.

3. Men can be good. The example of a Dad can't be overestimated when it comes to a girl's attitude towards men in general. He was a gentle, mild mannered father who never raised his hand and rarely raised his voice. He was faithful in his callings and was a reliable and dependable provider. A loyal husband as well. My parents had a lot of fun together. I credit him for helping me to chose a husband who is so much like him, in all the important ways.

4. How to deal with Weaknesses- My Dad was painfully shy as a kid but he worked hard at changing that as a grown up. He joined Toast Masters and became a great public speaker and as long as I knew him he seemed to easily converse with strangers and friends. He is quite the example to me of making strengths out of weaknesses

5. Love of History- Of all the people in my family, other than myself, my Dad was the most sentimental. He loved history, both of the world in general and family. I grew up with my Dad being the recorder of our family memories . This explains why Scrapbooking with all its girliness seems so silly to me. It's a guy thing! Because of his love of history we grew up knowing a lot about the world. He made sure we knew. With all the traveling we did plus his knowledge I learned a lot about the world as a kid and I appreciate that. I still love anything history.

6. Seeing the good in others. My Dad was a worrier, but he always seemed to have a positive attitude about others. He always tried to see the good in others and tended to give them the benefit of the doubt.

7. Art talent- What little art talent I have I owe to my Dad's side of the family. He and my Grandpa where great artists. My dad drew endless cartoonitures of people and events in our lives. He also won the contest for designing the Mascot for his division when he worked as a government worker. It does me proud to see my kids wearing their t-shirts with "Otto" on them.
8. Staying Healthy- My dad was always exercising. He wasn't the type to hit the gym but would often walk and do sit ups in our living room. He also gave me a healthy amount of guilt when we would eat junk food. His voice is still in my head, especially whenever I buy my kids (and me) sugar cereal. That is why I don't buy it more often I think. Not that desserts were banned in our house, he was usually the one making us chocolate shakes or popcorn.

A good example of something my Dad would do is the following story. When Tim and I were visiting with my parents in California we stopped at In and Out burger. My Dad was getting a shake and asked Tim if he wanted one, Tim said

"No thanks" but then my Dad asked again a few times. "Are you SURE you don't want one?" Finally Tim gave in. As my Dad passed him his shake he warned,
'These things will kill you ya know"

I often miss my Dad, especially when I see how much Joseph is turning out like him and think of how much fun they (and all my kids) would have had together. But I am grateful for the opportunity to have had him as my Dad and know that my kids are who they are in part because of how my Dad raised me. I am grateful for the Gospel in my life, another thing he taught me. That is probably the most important thing he passed on to me. With my knowledge of it, I know how to be happy in this life even when my parents have passed on. I also know I can see him again some day and he will always be my Dad.

Wednesday, April 02, 2008

I need a break

I seem to have a low tolerance for stress these days. Today I went to a meeting for planning our ward cookbook. I was the only one who brought kids. My kids were actually ok. I was impressed until the end when they went bolting down the hall of this sister's house and into the master bedroom. AAAGH. That, plus muffin crumbs on the floor, smeary finger prints on her windows and taking a self guided tour of the basement was enough to make me say. OK. I deserve a break. . . .for the rest of the day. I know, I have no idea what stress is.

Tuesday, April 01, 2008

Psychology Today

This is just too funny not to share. Perhaps a bit disrespectful to those who are dealing with mental illness however. If I offend anyone I apologize ahead of time.

When " A Glass of Milk" is So Much More

As a mother, I guess I should say a lazy mother, I often find myself saying no to appearently small requests from my children. This is because I know that what seems like a small thing can amount to much more than they even know they are asking.

Let me give you an example from this morning. I was reading this morning as my 5 and 2 year old were finishing up their breakfast. My 5 year old asks if he can have some milk. My first thought is "Noooo, I just got up and sat down again...". But I think about it and realize "Why not? He can even get his own cup and pour it, I don't even have to get off my lazy butt and put down my book" , so I say yes. . He gets out the milk, and the cup. I am pleased to see the milk jug is almost empty so there is very little chance of him spilling. He pours the milk with no incident and even throws away the jug.

Sam of course sees the whole thing and guess what, he wants milk too. Unfortunatly, the milk that was in the house is now empty. I have to not only get up now, but must now go out to the garage and get a new jug from the other fridge, get him a cup and pour it 'cause there is no way I am letting my 2 year old or even my 5 year old pour himself a cup of milk from a brand new, full to the brim milk jug. I then sit down to continue my book. Two minutes later Lincoln says "Uh oh, Sammy made a mess with his milk" He had spilled it all over the table.

So next time my 5 year old asks for milk, I need to think twice. "Can I have milk?" does not mean, "Can I get my self some milk and you can continue on with what your doing", it means
1. CanI get some milk, I wont spill it and will even throw away the empty container?
2. Can Sam have some milk too?
3. Can you go out to the garage refrigerator to get it?
4. Can you clean it all up when he spills it?

Granted, my kids need milk and I will get it for them anyway as I did, that is my job as a Mom and I love my kids and want to take care of them, most of the time anyway. I am not always this lazy and selfish I promise, but I have my moments like today. This is just an example of this sort of phenomenon. So when you see a mom refuse their sweet child what seems a simple and easy enough request. Don't judge her too harshly. They may be saying no to so much more. Some people see a glass as half empty, some as half full, I see it as aboout to be spilled.